Embracing Ego

The ego is one of the most misunderstood concepts and has a very negative connotation. It carries unnecessary heavy energy that a lot of people try to get rid of during their spiritual or self-healing journey, as did I.

But contrary to your desire to separate from it, deny it or get it out of your system, the more you actually attract it. The deeper you try to push something away, the louder the voice calls. The more you pressure something, the harder it will burst back out.

Let's define ego. Ego is your self-esteem or self-importance. It is the part of the mind that mediates between the conscious and the unconscious. It's responsible for reality testing and a sense of personal identity. It separates your perception of reality from mine.
It gives you a sense of self and is influenced by your internal and external environment, e.g., programming by parent figures, your ideas and beliefs, and your self-image…

It is obvious how ego can take a sinister turn by boxing yourself in with your beliefs and only seeing them as truth. It's easy to see how ego can make an individual believe the world revolves around him or her, as a result labeling everything else as wrong, weird or weak.
In these cases, you are using your ego as an expensive liability instead of using it as your greatest asset.

You are using ego to identify mental positions with yourself, as a need to be correct.
You are using your identity to impress, to gain attention or recognition as a need to express unnecessary opinions or knowledge. Romanticizing your world and putting yourself on a pedestal. You are using it to complain, judge, and gossip because subconsciously, you are refusing to work on yourself.

This all reflects arrogance, a loss of self by only thinking of self. It reflects behavior that tries to fill up a gap, a needing behavior that is concerned with what others think of it. It involves an individual that is deeply hurt, in pain, broken, incomplete, distracted, and afraid to look at the deepest parts of him- or herself. An unwillingness to be uncomfortable. An unwillingness to grow.

On the flip side, I encounter people who have entirely abounded egos. Eliminating their complete sense of self from the world. Hiding away. Afraid to be seen. Afraid to express and experience because it's all evil ego. Losing any worth of self.

This is just as bad. Without your ego, you won't achieve anything in life.
What if you learned to integrate the ego? Make it healthy, working for you instead of against yourself. See it as a positive attribute.
Ask yourself these questions;

How can you love another if you have no sense of self?
How can you work if you have no sense of self?
How can you take care of yourself if you have no self-importance?
How can you take care of others if you can't take care of yourself?
How can you create or shape your world if you can not perceive it?
How can you learn from your mistakes and grow if you have no ego?
I believe that the more you are able to handle and embrace the ego, the more confident, assertive, and willing you get. The more you will be able to design the life of your dreams.

You become a better listener. You understand others better because you know where their self-image comes from. Because you have felt and experienced it yourself. You've made the mistakes.

When the ego is handled with care, it builds resilience to not being over-defensive and over-sensitive.

It builds an openness to receive other realities and take the beauty out of them to fill your own. In turn, your existence can inspire others to reflect or implement it into their own.

In our early years, the ego can be experienced as growing pains, but once we learn to work with it, it can be a means of marvel.

As with everything in life, it is all about perspective and balance. Either an element can become your greatest opponent or your greatest ally.
The key is always acceptance, not avoidance. Don't dismiss it. Recognize it.

Everything can be used as a powerful tool to transform.

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